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August 17th, 2011

02:49 am - School, the Navy, and other things that make me question my sanity.
 I have been quite busy trying to find my footing before school starts. I have been doing a lot of thinking about how I want this year to go and I have come to a couple of conclusions.

 I am going to do my assignments on the day that they are assigned. None of this procrastination bullshit because that's when I seriously stress the fuck out. I was too busy going after a girl last year to get my shit done and if anyone tries to stand in my way of this plan, I will be like

I have also come to the conclusion that for three years, I have put the physical and emotional needs of everyone of my friends at Mercyhurst ahead of my own. This cannot and will not happen this year especially because I want to go into OCS at the end of this year (enlisting probably sometime this summer and going to do basic and shit) and I am going to have to get into killer fucking shape in order to do this. This means operating on my own fucking schedule, not one that anyone sets out for me.

  • 6:00 AM - Exercise or Run (weather/muscle soreness determining what is done)

  • 7:00 AM- Shower/Brush Teeth/Wash Face

  • 8:00 AM Breakfast

  • Classes will commence at normal times, making sure that I have time for lunch)

  • Homework will be done either between or after classes

  • 4:30/5:00 Dinner (Yes, us Yanks eat early as fuck)

  • All homework that has not been done before dinner will be finished afterwards (such as studying)

  • Once homework as been done, free time will be given in order to do whatever.

  • 9:30 PM Shower/Brush Teeth/Wash Face

  • 10:00 PM Bed

I know that you guys are probably like:

At the thought of me being in bed any time before about 4AM....but I not only do I want to do this, I need to do this. I've been thinking about the Navy seriously for about two years, but it's been in my head a lot longer than that because we had to do a project on Veterans for Mrs. Williams class and my Great Grandfather (on my Mother's side) was a Medical Corpsman. I feel like it's a sign guys. I don't know....maybe I sound like a fucking idiot, but what do you guys think?
Current Mood: pensivepensive

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August 6th, 2011

12:46 am
  Today, I was sitting on my bed minding my own business reading Generation Kill fanfiction (because it has kind of consumed my life) and Holly calls me to tell me that she has Polycystic Ovary Syndrome which I figured she had but really REALLY hoped she didn't.

Anywho, she starts telling me about her ex Dan and all this stuff about how she still wants to be friends with him, but not in a relationship which is admirable considering all the crap that has gone down (it's because she's still in love with him) and then asked me when I was going to be back in Erie. I told her that I was getting in on the 22nd to which she responded "Oh, well then I'm definitely staying in Chicago an extra day and then driving through Erie to pick you up and take you home with me. We can go to Niagra Falls!" I responded with "Yeah, that would be really cool!", and don't get me wrong, I would love to go, but

1) I do not want to put myself in a situation where the two of us are alone with one another for an extended period of time because she flirts with me...and I want her so bad it hurts, but she says she's straight.

2) I already made plans to help out with Campus Ministry planning/hang with friends.

So, I guess I am just going to text her and say, "Look I just got the itinerary for Campus Ministry and they are having planning sessions all the way until Friday and I just found out that the head of CM handed in his resignation...I gotta see how this year is going to work and who is going to take his place. Maybe we can go to Niagra Falls some other time."

Does that seem to be a good idea?

Also, I am quite a sad panda because I wanted to go for a run tonight and I pulled on my clothes...found socks that actually matched, but can't find my damn shoes. Oh, well. It's a sign I guess. I should probably pray to St. Anthony.
Current Mood: confusedconfused

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May 28th, 2011

12:20 pm - Best Moments of Spring Term
  1.  The Surprise Birthday Party (and having everyone and their Mom be in on it except a drugged up me)
  2. Katie Choma coming!!!!!!!!!
  3. The Breakfast Place (all three times I went).
  4. Pizza Day
  5. Searching for Haley's key.
  6. Practicum with the youngins
  7. Nights at the Stone
  8. Going out with Gretchen
  9. Almost going to Partners
  10. Spring Fest Concert
  11. The Party across the way the night we almost went to Partners.
  12. Buying 500 water balloons.
  13. Figuring out things to do with those water balloons (like attacking David).
  14. The Creepy Elevator
  15. The National Treasure Stained Glass Window.
  16. Walks in the rain.
  17. Easter with the Yovich Family
  18. Taking pictures on sunny days.
  19. Running
  20. Sign Language Conversations
  21. "Skyinking" with Emily.
  22. Finding Australian Tim Tams in the U.S.
  23. Cinderella
  24. Project Abolition Benefit Concert
  25. "Instant Bitch" cups
  26. Spontaneous Beach Trips
  27. Driving to the Coffee House and having David freaking out in the backseat.
  28. European History rant sessions.
  29. "Where oh where has my little Sara gone? Oh where oh where could she be?"
  30. Black Swan Night (complete with peanut butter oreos)
  31. Mall trip with Heather: The Grand Dress Adventure
  32. Sunsets at Presque Isle
  33. Dance Salon (Days I and II)
  34. The night we found out Osama was dead (and the insane Facebook posts that followed).
  35. Wandering around campus talking in British Accents
  36. "Your French sounds pretty good, ladies."
  37. Tim Tam Explosions for Breakfast
  38. Screaming my head off in the apartment with Heather during the Dadvail finals.
  39. Goodbye Gifts
  40. That one movie night where both movie watchers fell asleep.
  41. Spring Charity Ball
  42. Watching the Princess and the Frog for the first time.
  43. "Poke A Muscle"
  44. Going to Tops with Katie and the conversations that transpired on our search for Smores ingredients.
  45. Fainting before my Teaching Literacy to Primary Grades Final and still doing well on it.
  46. Perkins at 1 in the morning
  47. Applebees with the Campus Ministry kids
  48. Allegra's House and the Beatles Records
  49. Getting pulled over by a cop in my smoking car and having to save the day with no voice.

Current Mood: Blessed

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December 6th, 2010

03:56 am - College: A time for changes, realizations, and all around insanity.
 Because the thought of being productive in an academic sense is daunting at the moment...not to mention my head feels like a rock concert and a polka band fused together in my brain due to all the reading I have done...I have decided to be more productive in a introspective sense.

I have come to the realization over the past couple of months that I have allowed people to walk all over me, allowing them to flatten not only my dignity under the weight of their shoes, but the kindness I have shown them as well. I figured that if I stood up for people and left myself open to attack...I would be seen as a good person. I now realize that the only time people appreciate a door mat, which is what I have become, is when they come in from nasty weather or off a particularly slippery slope and need something to brush off the nasty particles... make it easier for them to stand on their own two feet without feeling as if they are going to fall over or track the nastiness into other parts of their lives. However, once their feet are clean...conscience clear...you are no longer needed.

Because this scenario has happened so many times in my life, I find it really hard to trust people...which is probably part of the reason why I am so horrible with them. Every time someone says something nice...or hugs me, I expect to turn the corner twenty minutes later and hear them talk about how repulsed they are not only by my mere presence, but how they find the fact that I am a happy....and God forbid NICE person...to be annoying.

College has taught me many things. It has taught me the cultural differences between the North and the South, how to look at a bell curve without thinking it's a symbol that aliens made in a corn field, that sometimes we don't get the recognition we deserve no matter how hard we work, and just because you go to college, does not mean that you are a mature member of society. With all of these lessons that I have learned over the past three years, there is one that I have forgotten to mention and is perhaps the most important thing I have learned here: what friendship really is (or at least what it seems to be).

For the first time in my life, I have found the people who like me for me. For my spanglish speaking, performing arts loving, "I love you." saying, teddy bear hugging, extremely opinionated, loud and obnoxious self. Sadly, I never really thought that a day would come when I would look foreword to hanging out with people. Where I could laugh...and be myself without fearing some sort of tongue lashing as soon as I was out of earshot. Now that I understand why God sent me to Mercyhurst College (soon to be University) in Erie freaking Pennsylvania. Every person that I have met here as changed my life...and even though I have gone through some hard times in this place...they have made me the person that stands before you now. However, the person that stands before you now...is no longer alone. She has friends, real ones who say, "I'll be there for you." and mean it.
Current Mood: pleasedpleased

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November 10th, 2010

11:11 am - Best Moments of Fall Term
 1. Getting Amy and Jessica as roomates.
2. People attacking me when they realized that I was back at this place for good.
3. The library study party at the begining of the term where we blasted loud music and everyone hated us.
4. Finding out that I was allergic to shell fish and then having Heather wave shrimp in my face.
5. The trip to the New York State Fair and the EPIC sweatshirt.
6.Basically every study session in the dance space.
7. Tech Work
8."Are you apart of this family?!"
9. Aaron gettin' crazy.
10. That one night out in the feild
11. Annalee and I becoming ghetto talk buddies
12. Watching Dr. Frawley flail around to an African Dance....BEST. PAYBACK. EVER.
13.Lindsey being obnoxious while dancing in the dance space
14. The adventure where we bascially fanagled our way into the PAC and danced on stage.
15. Austin cutting his hair off.
16. Fall Campus Ministry Retreat
17. "Alcohol is bad. "You're not allowed to say that in this house."
18.Cursing and talking about clevage in Campus Ministry
19. Meeting with the guys frm Sudan (one of them was totally flirting with me!)
20.Lindsey making me cry with her amazing choreography.
21. Bible Study
22. Workin' with the youngins in the yellow room.
23. "I wouldn't notice if you died, Sara"
24. Anna and I eating vegetarian chinese and having to give the guy directions to the apartment.
25. The first saving of "The Great Blueberry"
26. That one night I was hopped up on Nyquil
27. Lindsey coming back from Austrailia.
28. Lindsey being jet-lagged.
29.Realizing that some of the friends here I'm pretty sure I'll have them for the rest of my life.
30. Glee nights
31.Mulan night in the apartment
32.My Residency song
33.Kelly's early birthday celebration
34. The second time those two came over. lol
35.Finding out what happens when Gretchen gets drunk and wants to make sure she won't lose her wallet.
36.Tidings of Great Joy
37. Watching Scream and laughing hysterically at it...not to mention the poke war that followed.
38. Dressing up in scrubs for Halloween and having it look normal
39. Claire coming to see me in the Mac Lab
40.Emily trying to sneak attack me on the way back to my apartment.
41.Star Wars Night
42.My mad driving skillls when going to the UPS store.
44.David mimicking Captain Jack Sparrow and other people in our lives and sounding eerily like them.
45."That's why they call it window pain."
46. The girl at the mall who did not know how to wear tights properly.
47.David's "boots"
48. Clare thinking that my socks were baby socks.
49. Supernatural Nights
50.The second saving of "The Great Blueberry"
Current Mood: excitedexcited

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March 22nd, 2010

10:25 am - Everything that happens in life (good and bad) makes us into the person we are supposed to be.
 10 things you wish you could say to 10 different people right now (don't list names)
(I'm doing more than 10... I guess I just have a lot to say :) )

1. You are without a doubt one of the most amazing people I have ever met. Being your friend has made me a better person.
2. You a beautiful, brilliant, and amazing. Don't ever let anyone tell you that you're not and for the love of God, let yourself believe it.
3. I wish you could see the beauty and talent that you possess. I gaurantee you, one day you will be famous and I will be honored to say you are my friend.
4. You are one of the craziest bitches I have ever met...and I love you to death. =D
5. You're the other half of my brain, so talented, and so beautiful. I wish we went to the same school so that we could be insane together.
6. I feel like we never see or talk to one another. I miss you so much.
7. When you passed away, my heart was ripped from my chest, I felt alone and broken....as you have seen, I have absolutely amazing friends who helped to pick up the peices and put my shattered heart back together.
8. I'm so glad you talked that one night at dinner, it started an epic friendship.
9. The campout at my house has still not commenced, I am extremely saddened.
10. You're perfect.
11. My biggest fear is losing you and your friendship because you cannot see the amazing girl that you are.
12. Interestingly enough, when you waved shrimp in my face, I knew that we were going to be good friends.
13. No matter how many times we fight, I think you're hysterical and awesome.
14. I wish I could live in your head for one day....it would be a wild ass ride.
15. I feel like we all understand eachother in the family, but you understand me best. I can always come to you with my problems.
16. You are my inspiration to achieve greatness.
17. My friendship with you messed with my head to the point that I think that every friend I have is going to leave and never speak to me again unless they need something from me.
18. I feel like you make too many excuses.
19. I really want to get into a verbal sparring match with you in Spanish, but I feel like because we speak two different dialects we'd get lost in translation. lol
20. I know that you will never hurt her and as much as I claim to have contracted diabetes...it makes me so happy that you make her so happy.

Nine things about yourself.

1. I'm going to be a doctor, I feel it in my bones.
2. I'm afraid of losing the friends that matter the most to me.
3. My family means everything to me.
4. Although I talk a lot, I'm actually really shy.
5. Very few people have seen me in a completely vulnerable state.
6. I will always defend those that I care about most, even if it gets me in a heap of trouble.
7. I don't like being the center of attention, that's probably why I belittle my accomplishments.
8. Mercyhurst is the only place that I have ever felt normal.
9. Drama seriously makes me angry it is the only thing I hate more then improperly spoken Spanish.

Eight ways to win your heart:
1. Be taller than me.
2. Be athletic.
3. Appreciate the arts, but not to the point where you know the words to a musical.
4. Be funny.
5. Respect me as a person.
6. Have dark hair.
8. Love me unconditionally and have no alterior motives.

Seven things that cross your mind a lot:

1. Friendships
2. Books
3. Food
4. Exercising
5. Success
6. School
7. Family

Six things you wish you never did.

1. Let him take advantage of me.
2. Go to that party.
3. Like him.
4. Miss her funeral.
5. Spend more time with you.
6. Cared.

Five turn offs

1. Long hair, like past shoulders
2. Bad breath?
3. Perverted
4. Disrespectful
5. Stupidity

Four turn ons

1. Physically attractive
2. Dark hair
3. Kind
4. Intelligent

Three smileys that describe your life

1. :)
3. =(

Two things you want to do before you die

1. Travel across Europe

2. Find the person who is the other half of my heart and loves me for me.

One confession

Though I do not go to church often, I love the Lord with all my heart and trust in the plans he has for me.
Current Mood: nerdynerdy

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March 11th, 2010

03:28 am - Best Moments of Winter Term
 Sorry that this is late....but with the weather the way that it is right now....it seemed fitting.
  1. The Christmas Party
  2. Raw Edges
  3. Numerous campus adventures
  4. Muppet Treasure Island Night/Pirates of the Caribbean Night
  5. Searching for Bosco the cat/being introduced to Heather's fiance as her child
  6. Campus Ministry Dance Party
  7. Rehearsals for Raw Edges
  8. Any story that starts with..."So, this is what happened."
  9. Familial Bitch Sessions
  10. Eating legitimate Tim Tams
  11. The great Wegmans adventure
  12. Girls Night
  13. Girls Night Round II
  14. Gretchen's Graduation Dinner
  15. "You know, you have a really nice rack."
  16. Glee Nights
  17. Grey's Anatomy Days
  18. Momentary lapses of sanity in the Mac Lab.
  19. Human Growth and Devlopment with the best Seniors ever.
  20. Kicking Josh out of the apartment.
  21. The Erie Festival of Dance
  22. Sacrilege at the end of Term
  23. Building a fort in my living room....twice.
  24. Going out the parking lot across from the dancespace at 1 AM
  25. Getting accepted to the University of Newcastle
  26. Gretchen coming to Texas with me...and all of the insane stuff we did there.
  27. Having the students that I taught like me more than their teachers.
  28. Professor: "You're a Catholic school survivor?" Me: "Yes, sir." Professor: "Nice"
  29. Wanting to kill the "Techie" at the Mercyhurst Athlete Talent Show
  30. Pantseses

Current Mood: happyhappy

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February 24th, 2010

12:11 pm
  Monday is the worst day of every week because it signifies the end of a period of relaxation known as the weekend. As I walk down the hallways I hear 25 voices ringing in my head, knowing exactly which one belongs to the child out of line and I know that I know have a fifty minutes, thirty of which to eat and twenty to make sure that my classroom is prepped for my next lesson. Turning the corner and heading into the teachers' lounge wondering if there was anyway science had allowed for caffeine to be available in intravenous form. I find Piaget, Vygotsky, Erikson, and Kohlberg sitting there. A million questions are running through my head, the first if I am in an alternate universe, second if the paper ball that was meant for Kelly actually hit me and had a rock in it, and third if there is a pen and paper in my pocket so that I don’t miss on this once in a lifetime opportunity to pick their brains even if this is all in my head.

       The first question I asked them seemed simple enough. "What is the role of the family in a child’s education, especially with children ages four and five?" Piaget jumped straight in with an answer, “It is the job of parents to provide children with toys that stimulate imaginative and sociodramatic play, provide crayons, paper, glue, and listen, sing, dance, and respond to their children (Puckett and Diffily 2004).” Erikson added that “ the earliest experiences and interactions with the people who are most important to the infant and child are the foundation for the rest of that child’s life (Puckett and Diffily 2004) so I need to make sure that with my students I remain warm and positive, but also give them structure and boundaries so that they know what they can and cannot do. (Sternberg and Williams 78).” Piaget and Erikson seemed to focus on interactions of a physical nature; Vygotsky is decided to take a more psychological approach through his theory of socioculturization. “When a child sees their parents having a healthy discussion or even a fight children can learn how to argue for what they believe in if they are arguing with their friends or internally (Sternberg and Williams 51). It is the job of the parents to be models for the children to figure out how they can function in society. ”    Kohlberg decided to insult all of the others by saying that, “the only obligation that a parent has for children at that age is to make them obedient members of society, especially in the house and in the classroom to make the life of the teacher easier (Puckett and Difflily 102)

Afraid that the men were about to blow up at each other, I asked another question. Why is it important to discipline an unruly child in a classroom? Piaget started in with the fact “that children who are four and five are in the preoperational stage of thinking and because of that they have a hard time understanding other people’s perspective on many things which is why if you are going to discipline a student you should use positive discipline where your voice is not raised and encouragements are given (Puckett and Diffily 105)”. Kohlberg agreed that “children absolutely need the threat of punishment because that’s why the rules are obeyed, it is the first stage of moral development (Sternberg and Williams 78).” Erickson jumped in by saying that “young children at the ages of four and five years are in the initiative vs. guilt stage where children learn to assert themselves in ways that are considered socially acceptable and take initiative when it comes to relationships and tasks in everyday life. In order to do this children have to have boundaries given to them when teachers and parents give them rules as well as consequences for not following those rules (Sternberg and Williams 78).” Vygotsky brought up his theory of zone proximal development, which is the difference between a child’s level of independent performance and the level of performance a child can reach with expert guidance. The reason why there is even such a thing as a zone of proximal difference is because some person takes the time to give a child time, attention, and most importantly rules. These three things give children the expert guidance that they need in order to achieve much more socially as well as academically. If a student is not given these three things by teachers or parents then there is a great chance that they will not achieve as much as the students who have gotten the guidance they have needed. (Sternberg and Williams 52).

I’m glad that they could agree that rules given children the opportunity to attain more, but I wouldn’t help but wondered what they thought the best method would be for learning new information. From the few college textbooks that I had kept I knew that Piaget and Vygotsky had two different opinions so I directed the question to them. Vygotsky jumped in and said, “that cognitive development was more dependant on the interactions that children have with the adults in their lives. They serve as teachers to the young child and allows the child to enter into the process of scaffolding, where the level of assistance an adult gives becomes limited as the child learns more and more about the subject matter being taught (Puckett and Diffily 107).” Piaget disagreed saying, “that cognitive development actually occurs when the individual interacts with their environment, developing concepts by constructing mental schemata, organizing them into higher mental structures, and then adapting or adjusting them according to the demands of the environment that the child finds themselves in (Puckett and Diffily 103).

As I opened my mouth to ask what I thought was going to be my final question Jean Piaget looked right at me and said, “We have given you quite a bit of information. I would like to ask you a question. What lessons of ours have you implemented and or seen in your own classroom?” My response was, “One of the main things that I have seen in my classroom, that came from you Mr. Piaget, is that the thinking process of my students is definitely egocentric, where the child has difficulty understanding another person’s point of view (Puckett and Diffily 105). For example, one of my students, Julie saw that her best friend named Ashley was upset. When she saw the tears running down Ashley’s face, Julie gave Ashley her favorite stuffed bunny. She offered her friend the thing that she found most comforting and did not understand when Ashley thrust the bunny away because she couldn’t imagine that her friend would not have the same feelings for the bunny that she does.”

“One of the things that I have made sure to emphasize to the parents of my students that I learned from you Mr. Erikson is the fact that “the social environment in which children grow, develop, and learn can influence personality development (Puckett and Diffily 101).” It is because of this fact, that I have made sure that my classroom is one that gives the students a feeling of safety, happiness, and that they can do anything that they set their mind to. I make sure to involve my students involved in activities that promote social skills and language development. I make sure to let them know that I am willing to incorporate their ideas into the lessons that we are learning and to make learning a fun process. I make sure to communicate everything that is going on in my classroom to the parents of my students so that they have every opportunity to practice the lessons that I am teaching their children in class because the more people involved in the education of the next generation, the opportunities they have at succeeding in life.”

One of the many things that I have observed in my classroom among my students is what I believe that you, Mr. Vygotsky, would call the process of inner speech. “Inner speech is speech to oneself that directs behavior and assists in understanding (Puckett and Diffily 107).” My students have certain extension of this when they are playing with blocks, writing, drawing, coloring, etc. and they silently talk to themselves in order to get a hold on exactly what they are doing. I even do it most of the time when I am writing a paper, figuring out some kind of crisis, and even while reading books.

One of the things that I have learned from you Mr. Kohlberg is that ‘concrete materials and meaningful experiences support children as they construct their own mathematical information (Devries and Kohlberg, 1990).’ One of the activities that I have my students do at the math center is that I have them create equations for a certain number using manipulatives such as beans, keys, poker chips, etc. and have each child draw pictures of the various combinations. This one activity alone promotes logical-mathematical intelligence, visual and kinesthetic learning styles, interpersonal intelligence (when working in small groups), following multi-step instructions, the recall of details, and many more.
The men sitting across from me had pretty interesting looks of their faces, as if they figured I was just going to reiterate everything that they had told me and were surprised that I had chosen lessons to the contrary. Kohlberg spoke first, “All of us are glad to know that our lives were not wasted by figuring out the ways in which children learn and develop. It means so much to be able to hear not only that the lessons we have taught are applied, but how they are applied for a new generation of learners.” Erikson added, “I know that teachers do not get the respect they deserve monetarily and many times by other people who have jobs outside the education system so I am glad to see that there still individuals who are committed to the education of the next generation despite the drawbacks.” Vygotsky opened his mouth as if he wanted to speak, but I beat him to it, “There are drawbacks to any job. Even medical professionals, with all the money that they make nowadays, have to spends hours away from their families depending on where they work. The thing is that if you love what you do, the drawbacks really don’t matter as much as you think they will. Sure, sometimes I might have a hard time paying the bills, especially when I first start (that happens with everyone when they first get out in the real world) and if for some reason I become a single mother with kids to feed, it might to tougher some months than others, but if I can see a child’s face light up when they finally get something after working at for days or even weeks, if I can make sure that my students have fond memories through the activities that we have done throughout the year, and if I can make sure that at the end of that year that I have given my students and great foundation for their future educational endeavors, then I could be living off of baked beans without electricity and it will all still be worth it.

Before the men could reply, the bell rang so I turned towards the door on instinct. Suddenly, remembering I had been talking to people, I turned around to thank them, but they were gone. Maybe it was all in my head, maybe I had a psychotic break, but within the fifty-minute planning period that I had spent talking to great educational minds I learned a lot for my students and about myself.
Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative

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January 1st, 2010

09:45 am - Reflection for A New Year
 Over the course of a decade I have learned so many things. Even though some of the lessons were hard to learn, I know that I am now better person for enduring the ups and downs on the roller coaster of life.

I have met some of my best friends in the world over the past ten years. I mean I am friends with everyone that I meet and I don't like being mean to people. Each friend that I make means something to me and I am so glad to have so many people in my life who bring a smile to my face and make me laugh. I am so lucky. I am also lucky that there are people who have stuck by me no matter what has happened in my life. These are people who I consider to be the siblings that God didn't give me because if we were related we would wreak too much havoc for the world to handle. You know who you are and I honestly have no clue what I would do without you in my life.

I have come to realize that family, even though every family come with it's own drama, is the most amazing support system. You guys have seen me go through middle school, graduate from high school, and start my journey "into the real world" as I navigate my way through college. i have grown and changed before your eyes from a young child with her head in the clouds, to a woman who is looking foreword to the future. I could not have made it as far as I have without your support and I can't thank you enough for making me who I am.

I have only been in three relationships over the past ten years. One was a very hurtful relationship, one has turned into a great friendship, and one still hangs in the balance because i really have no idea where it will go, but each person has taught me some very vaulable lessons that I will carry for the rest of my life.
The first- Taught me that people aren't who they always say they are and love can change who you yourself think you are. I also learned not to let emotions over take me as much and to let people love me for exactly who I am.

The second- Taught me that under name brands lies a heart of gold.

The third-Taught me that there are chivalrous gentlemen who treat women like people instead of pieces of meat. I also learned that trying to gel involved in familial affairs because you love someone is a very bad idea and should never be done under any circumstances...because then you ruin the relationship.

In the past ten years I learned that illness and death are confusing. I will never understand why bad things happen to good people or why people have to die so young, but death is another part of life and has to happen so that life can continue. I’ve learned that death resonates with you no matter how many years go by and that when someone passes on, there is a hole that is forever created in the hearts of those who have lost that someone. At first, the hole hurts so bad you think the pain will never go away, but you find as time goes on the pain dulls. Eventually, the pain is gone, but you still remember your loved one fondly and miss them dearly.

I have also learned that with the sadness of death comes the miracle of new life. For example, with the death of my Uncle John came the birth of another little cousin Truitt. New life is such a wonderful thing and a miracle in and of itself when sad things happen. It shows use that God is there and around us always.

So, here's to another ten years of friends, family, love, and the circle of life.
Happy New Year, everyone.

This Note is written in memory of:
John Oses, Mr. James Volanski, Grandma Colvin, Granny, Gramps, Grandma Barb, Stephanie Villanueva, Daniel Gutierrez, Travis Sebolt, Jim O'Dell.
Current Mood: cheerfulcheerful

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